Forgiveness

“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” 
Matthew 6:14-15

These two scriptures are sobering every time I read or remember them. 

Forgiveness is hard to do, humanly speaking. It doesn’t come naturally. It is a work of the Holy Spirit as we choose to obey God regardless of what our mind is recalling and our heart is feeling.

It is easy to remember all of the pain someone has caused.  We are really good at allowing our mind to “replay the scene of the crime” – so to speak – over and over.  It doesn’t take any effort to rehearse our hurts because our emotions easily take the drivers seat and lead the way when we allow them to. 

Corrie Ten Boom said, “Forgiveness is not an emotion…Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart.”  

In February 1944, Corrie, along with her father and sister, Betsie, were imprisoned at a Netherlands concentration camp for hiding Jewish guests at their home.  Corrie’s father died 10 days after imprisonment. After the Netherlands prison, the sisters were moved to a concentration camp in Germany where Betsie died in December.  Corrie made it out of camp alive, but not without the scars of suffering.

In 1947, years after Corrie was released from torment camp, God sovereignly planned a divine appointment – Corrie was reunited with her former Nazi prison guard – this time in a church.  Corrie had just finished teaching the people about forgiveness when the guard stood right in front of her.  You can imagine what Corrie was thinking and feeling – yet, her enemy came to her in humbleness, reaching out his hand and asking her to forgive him.  

Corrie initially did not want to embrace his outstretched hand nor say “I forgive you” even though her teaching on Biblical forgiveness was fresh in her mind.  I imagine her mind was recounting all of the horrible treatment this man caused and her emotions were getting stirred from within her.  But regardless of what Corrie was thinking or feeling, she knew what she should do.  Corrie made a decision to do what God would want – respond to her enemy just like Jesus did for her (and you and me) – with grace and mercy.  

Corrie quietly asked Jesus for help to forgive her offender, and without the “feelings” of forgiveness, she reached out her hand toward the one who caused an immeasurable amount of unjust suffering, and said, “I forgive you.”  As Corrie was in the act of extending her hand and moving her lips, the Holy Spirit changed her heart and she actually felt that she forgave this man!

Extending forgiveness is not saying, “It is okay that you hurt me.” 
Forgiveness is saying, “I forgive you because Jesus forgives me and therefore, I will not keep a record of what you have done to me.” (1 Corinthians 13:5)

If we are keeping a record of sins done against us, it will be impossible to forgive our offender.  Consequently, denying forgiveness is disobeying God’s command to forgive (Matthew 6:14-15).  Not only are we grieving the Holy Spirit when we don’t forgive, but we are causing even more hurt to our soul as we continue to pull out the “crime scene” files in our mind (Ephesians 4:30). 

If we are not willing to forgive our offenders, no matter how grievous we have been hurt, then we do not understand the grace and mercy that God extended to us through the cross of Christ.

Jesus willingly suffered the wrath of God in our place and reached out his nailed scarred hand for us to embrace saying, “I forgive you” – and because of Christ, we can, in return, reach out our hand to others and say, “I forgive you like Jesus forgave me.” 

No sin that someone has committed against you or me is greater than or compares to the sins that you and I have committed against a holy God.  

If we are not willing to forgive, we are ultimately believing that what that person did to us is greater than the totality of sins we have committed against God.  Forgiveness is an act of our will.  However, sometimes when we step out in faith, the Holy Spirit will give us the good feelings in our heart to follow our obedience – like He did for Corrie.  But regardless of how we feel, may we ask God for help to forgive and take a step toward forgiveness.  Instead of replaying the crime scene done to us, let us recall the crime scene done to Jesus for us.  The cross shows us that God doesn’t remember our sins anymore; therefore, we should not hold onto the record of sins committed against us either.  

God doesn’t take pleasure in our pain – He has compassion (Lamentations 3:33 and Psalm 103:13-14).  With the words of Joni Eareckson Tada, “God permits what He hates to accomplish what He loves.”  God hates the fact that you or I were hurt, yet through our suffering God loves what the Holy Spirit will accomplish in our hearts – Christ-like character (Romans 5:3-5).

Questions to ponder:

Is there someone you have not forgiven? 
Do you rehearse and remember over and over the wrongs your offender has committed against you?
You may say you forgave your offender, but what if that person was standing in front of you asking for forgiveness – how would you respond? 
Would you respond differently if your offender stood in front of you and didn’t ask for forgiveness?
What does Jesus say to you as you stand in front of Him with your record of sin?